I feel most alive right after I feel quite dead.
Dead trapped in what I believe is being stuck in a circumstance.
That feeling of overwhelm or fear that feels like I have swallowed a glob of glue down my throat into my belly. It creeps up on me with the entrapment of the “shoulds” and “have to’s” and in those miraculous moments I catch it and shift it to possibility I feel ALIVE. Woohoo I don’t have to be a victim to this crap… whatever this crap may be. The conforms of pretty enough, smart enough or anything enough to stay under the radar of “judgement”.
Usually, when I am able to pull it off, it is incredible. It is a rush of fresh mountain air, peppermint oil kissed onto the roof of my mouth and sunshine warming my heart. It is pure magic.
I AM ALIVE.
This is switch is the place that I have an opportunity to take a leap into life. It doesn’t matter the circumstances, it could simply be the moment I decide to take a walk outside with my little instead of cleaning the kitchen. Or if I choose to clean the kitchen to do it with gratitude and delight for all that it represents in my life: nourishment, safety and abundance. That moment of truly switching and shifting to the momentum to joyfulness or curiosity or gratitude and I FOLLOW through with heart choice.
I have choice and when I choose to exercise my choice out of a feeling of love and fulfillment suddenly I feel powerful, flowing and alive… I will go as far as to say SEXY. I mean sexy is alive. In all levels it has the potential to be life giving in its literal form: sexy=creation and life giving. Figuratively what draws us in to life. What draws me in to someone, what attracts me on all levels, I am talking magnetism on a universal level is witnessing a being authentically choosing love and happiness.
No shoulds’, just musts’. I must be grateful and enthusiastic and I can certainly choose to clean my kitchen in a passionate joyful form of must instead of should.
Yes I feel alive when I experience something intense like a near life ending accident. The car almost hit me and it stopped an inch from my leg. Sure an adrenaline rush shifting me to I am alive and yet I would prefer to create a daily reminder affirmation of rooted understanding that I am here for a brief time. I am here for purpose and not by chance. I am here to experience and to share love. I am here to exercise my power to choose and when I make a love aligned, rooted in god-love-purpose decision.
I feel most alive when I am awake to the purpose of life.
The power of choice and the flow of joyfulness. I am most alive when I choose to be free.